A Thank You Letter to Insecure

By Kindsey Young

Why millenials are so thankful for a series like Insecure.


Dear Insecure,

Simply put, you are a gem. And though I still very much hate the word “millennial” because it stigmatizes the lifestyle of an entire age group (eye-roll); to many of us who fall in that category, Insecure is the most relatable show on television. There’s no other show that tells a more hilariously organic story of regular, Black millennials. Because of that, I’ve written you a “thank you” note on behalf of us all.

Thank you, Issa, for being you. We (women and men) all have a little Issa in us whether we care to admit it nor not. Thanks for revalidating that it’s okay for us to be flawed, it’s okay for us to be unsure, and it’s okay for us to mess up. (Hopefully, no one messes quite as much as you do, though, no shade.) Either way, we admire your will to always get back up and get through whatever it is, and try again. You’re funny, stylish, creative, fearless, loyal to your community, adventurous and a great friend. We relate to you in so many ways, and that’s probably because all of us have shared at least one of these experiences: a break-up; revenge dating; being broke; having bad credit; couch-surfing; passion-seeking while juggling hustles; trolling a lost love; getting ghosted on… We’ve all been there and back. We are you, you are us. Your resilience is inspiring. Thanks.

Thank you, Molly, for being unapologetic in your ways. You’re smart, independent, driven and a bomb-ass friend to Issa, always down for her cause. We love your overall confidence. On a career level, we respect and appreciate your constant strive for greatness. Plenty of us can attest to the adversity you faced at work, so thank you for being brave enough to speak up about your salary and your worth. Trust — we feel you on everything and we’re rooting for you. Now, we can’t lie, sometimes you’ve managed to make all the bad decisions we’ve made in the past feel less bad — and that’s because the bad decisions you make are on a whole ‘nother level. (A married man? Really?) For those of us millennials with a bad dating history, yours just might be worse… and that makes us feel better! Your terrible decisions have taught us some powerful lessons in love and self-worth. Oh, and Molly, in case no one gives you your credit — you’ve played a pretty big role in lifting a negative connotation of therapy. A lot more of us could probably use a Dr. Rhonda. Thanks, girl.

Kelli and Tiffany, thanks for a shedding a light on the importance of female friendship. You’re both so honest and expressive — something all friend groups need. Seeing you two interact always felt so fun and organic, so when the dynamic of the friend group started to shift, we all could relate. We know how it goes. Life happens and people start to drift apart. Thanks for being upfront about the way a major change can affect a tight-knit group of friends. Also, shout-out to you both for showing that millennial chicks can have successful and fulfilling careers.

Oh, Lawrence. You know it’s hard for us to get into conversation about you without it leading to strong opinions and/or arguments about your journey. But, thank you for being a conversation starter. You’ve sparked pretty big conversations and debates around the world. Some call you a legend, others call you… just being a guy. And just when we started to miss you (some of us, not all of us), you came back with a bang… and sadly, an STD. Yes, we judged the hell out of you. That isn’t like you. Or maybe it is. Either way, we’ll justify it as a reminder to have very, very safe sex. Do better, though, Lawrence. That was embarrassing.

Outside of all that mess, you represent the journey a lot of us millennials are familiar with. We know what it’s like to be unemployed, to feel inadequate, to feel overlooked — and we know what it’s like to try and create something of our own. And although we’ve still yet to receive a ‘woot-woot’ to our phone, we recognize your growth. It’s not easy being a Black man — yet alone in the field of tech — but you’re doing it, and your progress has not gone unnoticed to us. We all peeped your glow up. You lookin’ real good these days.

Daniel. We’ll keep yours as short as possible because we know talking about feelings isn’t really your thing. Although you were pretty much the catalyst for Issa’s issues, we appreciate you for making us consider how we should go about communicating in our relationships. Some of us were rooting for you, some of us weren’t. But thanks for representing the uncertainty a lot of us face when it comes to choosing who to give our hearts to. Plus, a lot of us can relate to being a Daniel, or even better: having a Daniel. Thank you for also telling the story of young, hard-working artists and creatives. We know that grind all too well. It was really refreshing to watch you pair your dreams of doing music with real hustle.

Thank you, Insecure, for being a voice for our generation. Thanks for being the perfect show for us.