By Luvvie Ajayi
Written by Laura Kittrell
Directed by Liesl Tommy
Meetup — Issa and Lawrence are seeing each other for the first time in a while and when she asks him what he’s up to, he runs through it in his head. He’s been sleeping with random girls he meets any and everywhere and being reckless with his BFF Chad. He even got an STD. But how do you tell your ex that? He just says he ain’t been doing much.
Permission — Issa’s idea is to throw a block party in her neighborhood so people can have nice things to look forward to. She goes to the DMV to get permits and the clerk gives her all the side-eye because the probability for jankiness with the event is high. Especially when Issa wants to pull it off in a month. Girl nawl. How you gon do that when you need permits for food, alcohol, insurance, and security. Issa grabs the stack of forms she has to fill out and is instantly overwhelmed. But new bae, Nathan is on hand, encouraging her and telling her she can do it. She needs too many permits for that: alcohol, food, insurance, security.
Real — Molly’s at work and gets a text from Issa telling her to hit up Andrew, Nathan’s friend, about her jacket from the festival. But she’s too embarrassed to ask for it. Karen, her assistant, shows up with baby shower gifts for Tiffany, because sometimes you need a hand on getting things done when the busy struggle is real.
Nathan and Issa are in bed looking cutesy and he’s distracted. Why? Because he wants to know how she figures out if the thing they have is real. It leads to both of them admitting that they like each other, in a world where people are supposed to play the “I’m cool on you” game.
Lose Track — Lawrence is nervous AF when he makes a phone call. Well, multiple phone calls. He has to call all his sexual partners to say he just found out that he has chlamydia. It’s protocol so they can also get tested. The last call he makes is to someone he didn’t even sleep with. His groupon peen has reached epic proportions to the point where he has lost track. Sir, what is your life about?
Issa is water scrubbing the floors of the apartment complex because people are trash and won’t pick up after their dogs. She gets a call from Lyft saying there’s an investigation of an assault in her car. She texts Nathan to let him know so he can call her.
Closed — Andrew drops off Molly’s jacket to her and she wants to high tail it away from him so quick. He asks her out and she says she is swamped with work so she will get back to him. Later, she tells Issa and Kelli she ain’t gon go out with him. Kelli is fine with her going out with “the Asian one” because “the Black one” is now her booty buddy. So why can’t she go out with Andrew? Because she wants to marry a Black man so why waste her time with this guy who is not that? Issa wonders if she is blocking her blessings and keeping what could be a great surprise away from her, like Nathan. The girls perk up like, oh that’s your man now? She says she is really into him in a way she hasn’t been into since Lawrence. Plus, he gives her great TED talks about her abilities and ambitions, like the block party she’s planning. So, check it. Her company is called Musiqal Inc, and the Q is there because they do events quickly. The girls laugh in her face cuz she needs to change that corny name. Turns out Nathan already told her that. Anywho, Kelli finds a recipe for an all-white cake with chocolate specks, since it is a poetic rendering of Tiffany’s light skinned baby.
Cheaters — Lawrence tells Chad he had to call all his conquests, which was humiliating. The quarterlifer crisis is hitting him, though, because the routine of work then f*ck is getting old and tired. Derek meets them up and they ask how he’s feeling about becoming a dad; he’s excited. Chad always gotta talk about himself so he says he would have been a great husband but since he lost his last boo, that ain’t work. Mind you, he lost her because he cheated. Would Lawrence take Issa back for cheating? He says no, because all he sees her as is a cheater.
Crazy Crew — Tiffany’s baby shower is here and it’s super girly and bougie, of course. Issa and Molly don’t recognize most of the people there, even the planner (Blair) who is making it seem like her and Tiffany are BFFs. Apparently, the “Crazy Crew” is what this squad of high-pitched girls call themselves, and their décor includes portraits of Tiffany reenacting maternity pics of Beyonce, Serena and Cardi B.
It’s a co-ed shower, where the men are not too pleased to be there. Lawrence shows up with a gift and sees Issa. When he’s about to go up to her, Dro stops him to ask about kush because they’re gonna need some substances to get through this event.
The Past — Issa is distracted because she hasn’t heard from Nathan in over a day, which is unlike him. Molly tries him from her phone and it goes to voicemail too (which he hasn’t set up, because: dude things). They both see Dro and Lawrence at the same time and wonder if they should go speak. For Molly, it’s a no but Issa goes to say hi to Lawrence. Small talk and awkward silence happens, but they get into a conversation groove where Issa tells him she’s stepping out on her own. She’s where he was at some point. Their laughs come easily and Molly looks on from afar, seeing the chemistry that is palpable. It gives her the courage to go say hi to Dro but that doesn’t go as well. In fact, it goes terribly because he’s still salty. It’s door open and door close in 30 seconds.
Hurt — Kelli brings her special recipe cupcakes and when one of the Crazy Crew girls is trying to reject them from the shower table, she shoves it in her hand. Another one of them disses them as “back up cupcakes” and I just knew Kelli was gonna send it up! She doesn’t, though, because she isn’t angry but hurt. She heads out the door and Issa and Molly follow her. She feels like she’s losing her best friend because Tiffany is her pair in their quad, and this baby is driving a wedge between them.
Tiffany comes out and asks whassup. They tell her she ain’t even have them on planning committee but she makes the good point that none of them even offered. Their excuses of new jobs and crashing on couches don’t hold up because life happens; figure it out. Kelli did ask Tiffany to help her plan a shower but got rebuffed. Why? Because Blair has kids so she figured she’d be better at planning it. OUCH. That hurt even me. Kelli is so hurt.
Awkward — They all return inside but none of them are happy. Molly is looking like the child of FOMO. Is she having baby fever? Well, she might but she ain’t even got prospects, so baby-fever is for naught. Issa reminds her that she just turned down a perfectly decent dude for a date. What about Lawrence? Issa says she’s over him and talking with him let her realize that. Right then, Candace (Dro’s wife) shows up! Molly’s being cool in her presence but Issa is being all weird and grinning like a Cheshire cat for no reason. Molly pulls out her phone and texts Andrew. Maybe she will go on this date after all.
New News — The shower is ending and Lawrence runs into Derek as he’s about to leave. Derek mentions that he saw him and Issa talking. Yup, and he says she seems different, in a good way. Issa and Molly are washing dishes in the kitchen as Tiffany walks in. Where’s Kelli? She left. The girls try to make excuses for her but they all know it’s bullsh*t. Since they’re on the baby thing, Tiffany asks Molly why she ain’t tell her that Candace and Dro are also expecting. Ummmm… that’s cuz she ain’t know. Bloop. But Tiffany knew that and was just being petty.
Issa’s phone rings and it’s Lyft saying Nathan has given them a statement so they’ve closed the investigation. Ummm… he can holler at them but not her? She scrolls through all her unanswered texts from him. Aight, what’s going on here? Why is he MIA?
EVERY TIME something is about to go well for Issa, the universe dropkicks her through the goalposts of life. She’s finally allowing herself to fall in like with Nathan and he goes ghost. She’s finally getting over Lawrence for real and she keeps running into him. I was also over here rooting for Nathan cuz I think she deserves a nice dude who will be there for her. But something is clearly not curling all the way over with him. What’s his deal? What’s his real story? I realize how little we still know about him and I think she’s realizing that too.
On to Molly. Sis, don’t block your blessings. Even if she wants to marry a Black man, she can let this Asian dude entertain her. She can get some practice on being a better communicator and partner. Or she can learn that sometimes, life’s plans for us are better than what we have planned for ourselves. OR she could just enjoy a night out in the company of someone. Who knows? But me thinks she should go on one date with Andrew. One date isn’t a lifetime commitment.
Now Lawrence… I’ma need him to get his life together. He’s out here so reckless that he isn’t using condoms and contracting an STD. If that is not life pouring cold water on you to tell you to chill a bit, I’m not sure what is. And honestly, Chad is not the best type of friend, because he will advise you down the river of iniquity. Lawrence might wanna get counsel from Derek and other people with more sense. I’m sure Lawrence Hive is really pleased but y’all might wanna sit your dude down and tell him to stop his slutbucketness.
So Issa, don’t get distracted by these men and their foolishness! Keep your head on. And spray any temptations of going backwards to Lawrence away, using the strongest of f*ckboy repellents.
This post is in partnership with HBO. As always, thoughts and opinions are my own.