Written by Tami Sagher & Jonathan Ames
Directed by Troy Miller
Ray has a new alter-alter ego: Kevin Bacon wants to play Super Ray. Wanting everything to be in order before he meets the movie star, Ray decides to break up with Jennifer Gladwell because he likes to be the heavy drinker in a relationship, and because she is crazy. When he tries to ease her hurt by quoting Bob Dylan, she storms out: "This is now the most disgusting break-up of my life!"
Jonathan meets with his new client, Lakshmi Bhargava, the owner of an Indian restaurant who suspects her husband, a limousine driver-poet, is having an affair because she can smell bacon on his person. But when Jonathan follows her husband (Vikram), he discovers he is actually spending his days at a greasy diner to avoid telling his wife he lost his limo-driving job. Thinking he can smooth things over, Jonathan brings the couple together to reveal the truth, but Lakshmi tosses Vikram out, viewing the lost job as worse than an affair.
Before his writing workshop, Jonathan's attractive blonde student Nina comes to discuss her story, and they nearly kiss but are interrupted by George, who is there as a guest speaker. Due to his prostate cancer and the news that his column is being cut from the magazine, George's talk is bleak. After class, George apologizes for his muddle, and voices his concern that he is addicted to marijuana and it has affected his driving. Jonathan suggests that George hire Vikram to be his driver.
Jennifer interrupts Ray's meeting with Kevin Bacon and accuses Ray of assaulting her - and giving her oral chlamydia of the mouth. The bartender intervenes in the argument on Jennifer's behalf and tries to eject Ray, not wanting any STD carriers in his establishment. Defending himself, Ray inadvertently punches Kevin Bacon, and decides the actor is not cut out to play Super Ray after all.
When George and Jonathan arrive at the diner, Vikram pulls a gun in an attempted robbery. Jonathan and George eventually talk him down, commiserating about their feelings of worthlessness. George offers Vikram a driving job, but then inadvertently shoots off Vikram's gun and the three have to make a break for it. They careen off into the night, with Vikram at the wheel of George's orange Mercedes.