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I am not a professional toastmaster, but I am usually the first person after the predesignated toasters to stand and speak my mind. Actually, I like to toast. I often prepare and rehearse the right words the night before. Then it comes out of my mouth spontaneously and sincerely. If you can't do that, at least do this:
1. Wait your turn. There's a specific order to these things that cannot be violated at a reception: best man first; then groom; then bride, if she wants; then father of the bride; then father of the groom; and so on. Unless you're one of those people, have another
drink and be patient.
2. Quietly stand and ask for attention. No clinking of glasses, wolf whistles, or, "Hey, I'm talkin' here!" joke lines. Show a little class for once in your life.
3. Never say, "You know, I've never done this before," or, "Boy, am I nervous, I'm sweatin' like a pig." No one cares. Just get on with it.
4. Say something nice and personal. Avoid the standard crap like, "Here's to two wonderful people," or "I second what that guy just said." If you have nothing witty or heartwarming to add, don't stand up in the first place.
5. Here are a couple of ways people I know end a toast. "Salut'!" is always good. It means "to your health." Or, there's always "Cent'anni!" It means "a hundred years"- i.e., "May you live that long." If you want to strike a religious note, end with "E che Dio
ti benedica," or "God bless you." Who can argue with that?
6. Finally, make it short, my friend. It's a toast, for chrissakes, not an address to Congress.
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Mob Facts
The FBI's operation "Mobstock" charged members of the Bonanno and Genovese families with taking over brokerage firms and bribing and threatening brokers to pump up the value of stocks for a quick profit.
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