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Quotes

MAHERISMS

"[Romney] picked a guy this week: Paul Ryan. Scientists said this would never happen, but it did: the ticket got whiter." - Bill Maher

"Phoenix had nine days in a row over 110 degrees. And, of course, you're not allowed to hire a Mexican to fan you there anymore." - Bill Maher

"I hear in the media all the time, the people want the ideas. The people want 'The Hunger
Games.'" - Bill Maher

"Women say, 'Oh, you'd be a great mom.' No, I wouldn't. I would be a terrible mother...I don't even like other people's kids." - Chelsea Handler

ON SUSTAINABLE ENERGY


"It's okay if you don't believe in climate change...But, do you like clean air? Do you like clean  water? Do you like solar energy? Do you like wind energy? Do you like energy efficiency?" - Peter Byck

"Mitt Romney loves coal. He once put a piece of coal up his ass; it came out a diamond." - Bill Maher

ON CUTTING THE DEFENSE BUDGET


"Do you think China is just going to come walking over, you know, fly in like they did at Pearl Harbor? No, they're going to attack us through cyber-terrorism." - Mark Cuban

"We spend more on defense than the next 17 nations combined. Our Navy is bigger than the next 11 Navies combined. Do we need this much?" - Bill Maher

ON MITT ROMNEY

"I have no problem voting Republican, and I have...Mitt Romney...he's the invisible candidate. He never comes out and takes a stance." - Mark Cuban

"Mitt Romney's plank is to not saying anything substantive about anything at all. Including what he bought at the hardware store." - Alex Wagner

"We have two candidates who are in that exact same vote. Barack Obama is incredibly reluctant to talk about his record...Romney is also being very vague, because the conservative base is very skeptical about the guy." - Reihan Salam

Mitt Romney loves coal. He once put a piece of coal up his ass; it came out a diamond.

Episode 255

August 17, 2012

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