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Quotes

Maherisms:

Maybe Obama is bad a class warfare, but "warfare-warfare," he's pretty good. - Bill Maher

We're so anti-progress. We're so anti-science. We're missing the boat on solar panels. China's thrilled that we're we're now falling way behind.  - Bill Maher

Sarah Palin said she would tell us by the end of September whether she was getting in the race. No word so far. But, she said she is thinking. That's news in itself. - Bill Maher

Since the economy won't come back until we start buying stuff, and the only stuff Americans buy is either anything from Apple or guns...Apple has to make a gun. - Bill Maher

On The Republican Field:

Here we see a strange thing: politicians don't do what they say. - Salman Rushdie

I just think it is a little bit ironic for somebody from the Republican side of the aisle where the motto is laissez faire, which means to be hands-off...to be calling the president "a bystander." - Jennifer Granholm

On Al-Awlaki:

Anwar al-Awlaki was an American citizen. He had never been given a real trial in a court of law. And we executed him. Isn't that Rick Perry's job? - Bill Maher

The price of freedom comes with certain unpleasantness that we sometimes give up a little bit of our safety, and in return, we all make the agreement that we all have the same rights...As much as we trust Obama, would we want to see a President Bachmann with the same right to do that? - Seth MacFarlane

When people commit the crime of treason, join the enemy, fight against their own country, they usually sacrifice a few rights. - Salman Rushdie

On Obama:

I've heard this so many times before: "he's got his mojo back." If I had a nickel for every time they switched back and forth on Obama, I could bail out Greece. - Bill Maher

I think what the liberals hate about him is that he sold out on the environment and he sold out on the poor.  - Bill Maher

He's caved unnecessarily. He should have come in like a house on fire. He had the public behind him. We were in a crisis. That first 100 days could have resembled more FDR's first 100 days. He didn't have to cave in on the Bush tax cuts. He didn't have to cave in on the debt ceiling fight.  - Bill Maher

He doesn't look like the adult in the room. He looks like the substitute teacher who's just trying not to have a nervous breakdown. - Bill Maher

It was never, "Yes, HE Can." It's supposed to be "Yes, We Can." - Van Jones

On The Antichrist:

 I think it's good he's here...I think it's about time we had an antidote to all this crazy "Christ" shit that goes on in America. Bring him on.  - Salman Rushdie

He's already shown his "not the Antichrist" certificate, but it was the short-form one. When he shows us the long-form one, then I'll buy it. - Seth MacFarlane

Does he take his orders from Satan, the Antichrist? Does Satan take his orders from the Antichrist? Or, are they like, you know, the Joker and the Riddler? They're just two bad guys who don't really work together, but they have a common enemy? - Bill Maher

42% of Republicans think the Bible is literally true. A fourth of them think the Antichrist might be Obama. And this stuff does infect politics. - Bill Maher

On Israel:

Republicans today are trying to out-"right" Netanyahu, essentially, in giving power to the folks in the Knesset, who are to the extreme right. - Jennifer Granholm

If you look at what's actually happening in the Middle East right now, the interesting subject is not Israel. The interesting subject is what is happening in the Arab world. - Salman Rushdie

On The Occupy Wall Street Protests:

Now you've got this face-off between some of the most selfish people in American politics and some of the most selfless. And I think we should stand with these young people. - Van Jones

On Green Energy Policy:

Don't be mad at Obama for trying to stand our companies up, be mad at China for knocking them down. They are flooding the world with cheap solar panels to kill our companies. And rather than Republicans standing with the president to get our industry going, they say, "Hey, take our critical industries as long as Obama gets a bad rap." These are not patriots. These are not patriots. - Van Jones

Episode 226

September 30, 2011