Guests: Thomas Friedman, author; Janeane Garofalo, actor/comedian; Rep. Marcy Kaptur (D-OH); Richard Dawkins, author/biologist; Admin. Lisa Jackson, Environmental Protection Agency

Maherisms

After all these months of seeing these 'teabaggers' hold up signs of Obama with the Hitler mustache painted on, we have proof now that Obama isn't Hitler; Because when Hitler tried to get the Olympics, he got it.  Bill Maher

Congratulations to the citizens of Rio de Janeiro. They spent all day today partying, doing the Samba in the streets with the breasts hanging out...and then they heard about the Olympics.  Bill Maher

I was shocked that Letterman has been having affairs. I had no idea he was even running for office.  Bill Maher

They found the earliest-known skeleton of a human ancestor, something that lived in Africa 4.4 million years ago. Republicans are demanding to see its birth certificate.  Bill Maher

Sarah Palin, still not the brightest woman in the world. A reporter asked her what she liked most about Hong Kong, and she said, 'The part at the end where he climbs the Empire State Building.'  Bill Maher

This week Sarah Palin's memoir became a bestseller. It's not even out yet -- it's being translated into English.  Bill Maher

On the Environment

In a year, maybe two at the most, China will literally clean our clock on clean energy.  EPA Admin. Lisa Jackson

Our foreign policy would be a lot clearer if we didn't have this oil mantra wrapped around us like a noose.  Rep. Marcy Kaptur

We should be concerned that we don't know enough about clean water.  EEPA Admin. Lisa Jackson

In the past few years, scientists as well as regular folks have been able to observe climate change by using a state-of-the-art instrument: our eyes.  Bill Maher

Congressman Joe Barton says the answer to massive climate change is simply to adapt. Which is why he has a giant ark in his garage.  Bill Maher

On Partisan Politics

There's only one thing worse than one-party autocracy, and that's one-party democracy, where the other party just isn't playing at all.  Thomas Friedman

Some of the raw partisanship, I believe, is directly related to the change in the way campaigns have been financed.  Rep. Marcy Kaptur

It seems like the Senate is where all progress goes to die.  Bill Maher

This healthcare debate has been controlled by people from states that don't have people.  Bill Maher

I cannot take this giving in and this bid for bipartisanship. The Republicans will NEVER, EVER compromise.  Janeane Garofalo

President Obama and the Democrats in Congress need to learn a lesson from the healthcare debate and realize you can't change someone's mind if they don't have one.  Bill Maher

On Racism

These people who are also being led by the Glenn Becks, Michelle Bachmanns, the Rush Limbaughs, whomever, they are no different than any other white-identity movement that's part of our history.  Janeane Garofalo

The Republican Party has been willing to carry water for racists in this country since about the 1950s.  Janeane Garofalo

On Healthcare

If the Democrats were writing the Hippocratic Oath, they would start with, 'First...okay, do a little harm.  Bill Maher

For those of us who went to the polls in November looking for change and spent an hour in line, I want my hour back.  Bill Maher

Somehow we live in a country where 65% of the people want something, but it's a dead issue in the Senate.  Bill Maher

On Nuclear Iran

I think, if Iran gets the bomb, you will have a nuclear Middle East.  Thomas Friedman

Why does it seem like some people can be trusted with a bomb, and other people would do the wrong thing with a bomb?  Janeane Garofalo

On Evolution

There's sure enough plenty of variation in brain power. All the way from Einstein on the one hand, to Sarah Palin at the other.  Richard Dawkins

28% of the British people think that humans walked with dinosaurs. Twenty-eight percent of the British people get their science from "The Flintstones," in other words.  Richard Dawkins

I love that. God is so powerful he can create the universe [in six days], but, then he's pooped.  Bill Maher

Europe is becoming Americanized. First, they got the food, and now they got the stupidity.  Bill Maher

On Terrorism

I think something each American can do is not to let any American feel isolated.  Rep. Marcy Kaptur

If you're talking about big anger that causes somebody to bomb something, that's about much more than carnal knowledge. That is about foreign policy decisions.  Janeane Garofalo

[Terrorism] is about foreign policy; it's about what we do. It's about that and it's also about how much they hate their own governments, okay, who also keep them down, repressed and behind.  Thomas Friedman