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Poem: "3 Part Bitter Ex- Girlfriend Poem Number 9872643
Poet: Jerry Quickley
part 1 - How my Front Door got Broken
As she fled my apartment
with her possessions and my heart
she slammed the front door
cracking it fully from top to bottom
And she said
You'll probably put that in a poem too
Won't you
You sick f**k
She was right
part 2 - Sorry about the Rash
I wanted to meet with you to talk
and you said that we should
and then you said that
you couldn't without
first talking to your chaperone
I'm sorry, I mean your therapist
It's not like I'd ever report your
acts of petty acts of torture from the stage
or anything
or write it down and
use it for my work or anything
I'm just a demented troubadour
a little bit too paranoid
But I really have moved on
in many important and meaningful ways
I remember how much you loved
white chocolate
so I melted a big block of it
on the stove
and while it was still boiling
I poured it on
the voodoo doll likeness of you
Just in case you were wondering where
you got the f**king rash from
part 3 - Tales of MC Junko
I really want to get
a Dog
A Golden Retriever
But I need a Woman first
The dog's love is so
unconditional and magnificent
If I get a Dog before
I get a Woman
I'm sure I'll turn into
one of those Animal Freaks
that have birthday parties for
their Dogs and all their
Dogs' Doggie friends and make
them wear little party hats
and videotape that lunacy
And without a Woman
I'll sit at home with my Dog, who will be named MC Junko
and he'll have a Fat gold chain
with his name cast in Giant rough hewn gold letters
MC JUNKO
and we'll get a convertible
and we'll ride around with the top down
and I'll make him wear sunglasses
and when we roll up to the park,
all the other Dogs will all be jealous
and they'll say
'Oh shit! Check out MC JUNKO's Fat ride
And his Fat gold chains!'
And MC Junko and I will sit at home
watching the video of his birthday party
becoming less and less attractive to Women
as we spend More and More time with
each other
I Definitely need a Woman
before
I get a Dog
Oh god
Look at what I've been reduced to
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