BERT SUGAR POST FIGHT ANALYSIS

by Bert Sugar

Going in to last Saturday night's WBA heavyweight championship fight the question was whether seven-foot-328-pound heftyweight champion Nicolai Valuev was a fighter or a sideshow act. Coming out, the question is still there. And requires a Valuev judgment.

Watching this cross between the man Jack met at the top of the beanstalk and Ivan Drago all we came away with was that he was BIG. "How Big?" an Ed McMahon might ask. Big enough to be able to step over the top ring rope on his way into the ring. Big enough to sell shade. Big enough to look like a parade standing still. And big enough to donate his trunks as a shelter for the homeless.

As for his boxing abilities, his movement rivals that of the earth around the sun, his handspeed is slower than that of the Venus de Milo's and his footwork that of the proverbial one-legged tap dancer.

And yet, for all his obvious faults, Valuev landed 186 punches, clubbing Monte "Two Gunz" Barrett into submission at 2:12 of the 11th round--Barrett rescued when his corner less threw in the towel than the trainer, trainer James Ali Basheer jumping into the ring to save his battered and befuddled warrior when the referee failed to.

Barrett, who could have used a howitzer and a bazooka to go along with his two "gunz," had more of a chance of knocking out Valuev's kneecap than he did his nine-inch taller opponent. He tried mightily in the first round, windmilling his way in, but all he got for his efforts were several ponderous rights from Valuev. And when he did manage to get inside the sequoia tree posing as a fighter, the Russian bear--with the greatest weight differential in boxing history, 106 pounds--wrapped his massive arms around Barrett almost as if be were cuddling his bear cub. The only two times Barrett managed to get to Valuev were with a solid left in the fourth round and with a series of punches in the sixth. Other than those two and few times, Valuev controlled what little action there was, knocking down Barrett once in the eighth and twice in the final round.

A pretty fight it wasn't with no hint of the so-called "Sweet Science." And although Valuev raised his record to a lofty 45-0 there were no comparisons to be made with Rocky Marciano and his 49-0. (Nor, it must he noted, were there any calls to bring back John Ruiz.)

Instead we were left with comparisons to the tallest and heaviest heftyweight champion before Valuev, Primo Carnera, another sideshow act who became champion and was labeled "The Ambling Alp." Off his performance Saturday night, rather than calling Valuev "The Russian Giant" maybe we should call him "The Ungainly Urals."