Written by: Donick Cary & Jonathan Ames
Directed by: Adam Bernstein
Jonathan meets with a new client, Dr. O'Connor, a virgin dermatologist who needs a letter delivered to his fiancée Hee Cho at the Spa Castle in Queens. Hee's family is against him because he's Irish and they have blocked all communication, but Dr. O'Connor needs to get word to Hee that he has taken a position as a ship's doctor and wants to set sail with her for a new life in Argentina.
At his writing class, Jonathan learns that Louis Greene won the New Yorker 35-and-under fiction contest, with a story based on Jonathan. When Nina comforts him after class, they kiss, and she asks Jonathan to engage in some spanking role-play.
Vikram drives George, Jonathan and Ray to the Spa Castle, ostensibly to celebrate Ray's birthday. But when Ray realizes Jonathan is on a case, his feelings are hurt. George tries to cheer Ray up by getting him stoned while Jonathan delivers the letter.
Since the Spa Castle has separate bathing areas for men and women, Jonathan has to go undercover in the women's locker room, in search of Hee. He's spotted as an imposter but begs for help finding Hee. A young man approaches claiming to be Hee's friend and promises to deliver the letter.
When the three friends are having massages later, the boy Jonathan gave the letter to busts in, now dressed as a beautiful woman, and Jonathan realizes that Hee is actually a he who is also a she. Security guards come knocking, and a mad-cap chase ensues. They make it to George's car just in time for Vikram to spirit them away. Geroge's car breaks down, forcing them to flee on foot through a graveyard. Jonathan tries to lure the spa security guards away with Hee's bag of money, but when one pulls a gun, Ray runs to warn Jonathan and falls into an open grave. George and Vikram come to the rescue with shovels, knocking out the guards.
The three friends and Vikram deliver Hee to the dock just in time to shove off with her doctor. Jonathan tries to alert Dr. O'Connor that Hee's not a she, but the doctor sees Hee as perfect. As the tug boat pulls away, the friends and chauffeur head off to continue their celebration of Ray's birthday.
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